Sunday 23 September 2012

Is it possible to share a bed platonically?

I'll admit to having been rather naive a few times when it comes to this situation. Somehow I don't seem to learn either...

The first time... 
I shared a bed with friend who I had mixed feelings for it turned out to be a success story -i.e we didn't mess things up and get it on. We were both too well behaved, clearly. Maybe this successful sleeping arrangement tricked me into thinking it was safe territory...who knows?!

The second time...
I wasn't so lucky. I was a student and had been out late to a local cheesy night club. A group of us piled into my room for late night /early morning chats and drinks afterwards and I was distracted by my soon-to-be boyfriend's hand that was edging closer and closer to mine quietly, unnoticed by anyone else but me. Doubtful of this situation and worried about where it might lead, I didn't want to be left alone with him so I offered one side of my double bed to his friend who had joined our group. I did it with no agenda whatsoever, seriously.

Needless to say our feet brushed, we were both feeling a bit tipsy and I'm not ashamed to say it but in the dark, curled up in a warm bed, I thought 'Why not?!' It was fun and I was happy to see in the morning that he was much fitter than I remembered so altogether it was a pleasant experience. For a while it also drove a nice wedge between me and the other guy giving me time to figure out how I truly felt.

The third time...
was a long-time-passed ex and good friend. We shared a bed as I was visiting and we didn't feel it would be a problem as he was besotted with a mutual friend/on-and-off girlfriend and I had a boyfriend- also a mutual friend. Unfortunately our familiarity with each other led to a strange situation. He decided to show me some 'artistic' photos of his girl and then a 'home' video of sorts. 

All of which I approved of and was relaxed about but in the end it was all too much for the boy and I had to advert my eyes whilst he er, let's just say...sorted himself out. His subsequent awkwardness and guilt later led to me acquiring a nice bottle of wine for my troubles which was fine by me as it had not really phased me. I didn't tell my boyfriend though the real reason it had been bestowed upon me...I deemed it unnecessary.

The fourth/fifth/sixth (who knows how many) time... 
No brainer. My recent long-term ex who I was clearly not over, and I guess he was having trouble detaching himself from me too...We were just kidding ourselves and 'platonic' sleepovers for 'convenience' when I was in town visiting were never just that. We eventually realised these sleepovers were destructive and I stopped staying over and began staying with other friends.

Er..the seventh time... ?!
Fit guy, I'm ashamed to say with girlfriend... Let's not even pretend it was meant to be a platonic sleepover though we went through the pretence of it all to get there...

'Oh I'm too drunk too walk all the way back across the field to my dorm,' 

'Okay, stay in my bed, fully clothed...'

'What a great idea! Oh whoops my clothes came off somehow...'

'Oh dear...what a pity so did mine...'

...

The eighth time...(we return to this week's date)
I'm really not making a habit of sleeping with taken men, I really don't approve...until this year it had never happened, I swear... and then they go like dominos! Like Ash (Bruce Campbell) in Evil Dead 2 with his demonic possessed hand, Lash's hand had a mind of its own even as he slept...

... (imagine my earnest look)...

...who are we kidding?! 

Though it did kind of seem that way at the time and he was a little perplexed by it when we'd recovered. I did try and steer it in more healthy directions but it was like a compass set to north... 

More on this another day perhaps...

Sooo....
What have we learnt from this little collection of tales? 

Maybe don't sleep in a bed with someone you have mixed or complicated feelings for...?
Or anyone remotely sexy for that matter...
Or after watching porn together...
Or if you are feeling an incy bit horny...

We can probably fashion a list. I have other friends who can offer up their stories too. 

If anyone is reading this blog out there I'd love to know your thoughts/stories/anecdotes...feel free to engage! 

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